Bhante Wimala spoke to our office gathering on Monday to a full conference room and many thanks for bringing him to their attendance. He stuck around until late on Monday, when I drove him to Ft. Worth to spend the evening with Nandar, his associate Theravada Buddhist monk, prior to heading to California for this past week. I've got to be honest here, I was exhausted, I mean to the bone, tired. I loved every minute of my time with him, as his energy, perspective and appreciation of life are so rewarding to all those nearby. During his tenure of 5 days with me, we drove nearly 1,000 miles together, so he could deliver 5 speaking engagements, 2 church mediations, 4 meetings, and a party at my home in his honor. In my best calculation, I figured he addressed over 500 people in attendance of his talks. Each person present was enthralled by his vision and his directions for a fulfilling lifestyle, as Buddhism is not a religion, but rather lessons in a way of life. “To live a life of Buddha.” As Bhante says it, there is no organization that drives Buddhism, but rather a loose knit group of people with a common practice. Unlike Christianity, there is no head of a church or international organization such as Catholicism; the followers of Buddha just do what their heart directs them to do. I can actually be a follower of Buddha, while I still declare myself a Christian, as I just happen to believe that Buddha was an enlightened individual who walked this earth some 2593 years ago influencing others in his path.

My humanitarian monk friend, Bhante Wimala, is in Texas with me till Monday at noon. I picked him up this morning in Houston and we drove to Wimberley for a speaking engagement at the Unity Church. It is just so great to have him here and be able to spend time, side by side, with such a great spirit. I was so relieved when I got the call yesterday that he arrived on his prescribed flight from New Jersey, as all flights coming from the east coast have been canceled due to the virtual white out, snow storm that has Dropped so much on the eastern sea board. He does live a charmed life, when his actual airplane left Brazil prior to the storm and arrived just after the snow subsided and his flight was the only flight leaving Newark airport yesterday morning, and on time!

Brody, my dog is enjoying the snow here in Dallas!

Today, I had a texting exchange with my brother in St. Paul Minnesota regarding my attitude to business. First, let me preface this detail. I come from an entrepreneurial family with four of the five adults involved in some sort of small business, my brother owns/runs a cooking school, my sister is a home based CPA firm and my brother in law runs a small health care products company. As I noted previously that our great uncle Jim (Ragner Benson) started and ran his own construction company back in the early part of the 1930s to the later 1970's which his decedents sold for many millions of dollars. We all just have it in our blood, and my parents don't think twice about commending either sibling for their accomplishments and so forth between the parties.

Oh yes, more cold rain and yet another day without walking or getting out of the house. I nearly forgot what it was like to live in Minneapolis so many years ago, and not being able to get out of the house for 3 months… oh, wait, I had snow skis and a heavy winter coat for the “winter activities” that come with that part of the country. Here it's just cold, and now that it is nearly the middle of February, I am ready for spring, which I keep saying is just around the corner. I am certain, and so are my house plants, all four fichus trees who've been held up for the past 90 days and they too are suffering cabin fever. Guess its relative; we would all have to buck up and live with the pending weather till April if I remained right off Lake Calhoun in Uptown Minneapolis. Thank God, I don't live there, I tossed my wool suits upon arrival some 26 some years ago, and though I thoroughly enjoyed my life back then, I am fooling myself if I am going back to the land of flannels and “oh, my gosh”.

Super Bowl Sunday, and exciting day of American Football, parties, Chili cook offs and plenty of beer to go around. This year's teams offered an exciting shot for the city of New Orleans, with hopes of bringing home the diamond encrusted famous ring and a shining new trophy. But really this is much more for the city which is a shadow of its prior self and a place that still remains on the mend from the wrath of Katrina. I don't watch football, so it was my intention to just stick around enough to share its results while pouring a cup of coffee at the kitchen counter in the office tomorrow. As I watched Meet the Press this morning both Hank Paulson and Alan Greenspan shared their confirmation for the Colts. While I secretly hoped that the first time visitors, the Saints, would pull off an upset to the surprise of the sports world. 

I awoke at 2:30am in the middle of the night, taking a second to determine that must have fallen asleep on the sofa last night in the middle of my conversation with Heather here in my living room. She is staying this weekend and all next week focusing on the new endeavors within the sales department reorganization. “You just laid down in the middle of our conversation, next I heard snoring.” I knew I was exhausted; guess I just didn't realize what little I had left.” Last week included meeting on top of meeting, the trip to Houston and a handful of client appointments. So by the time the weekend hit, the only thing I could think about was a free weekend at home.

Today included my monthly spa day, with a schedule change by the nail salon “Lesa, can you come 20 or 30 minutes late?” “Sure, I have absolutely nothing on my calendar today.” Well, really my plan was to finish the second season of the Sopranos this afternoon, and upon my time to leave the house I had a mere 45 minutes left in the final CD. Can't say how thoroughly I've enjoyed this television show over the past handful of weeks, I guess because so many things about Tony Soprano resonate within my own life. I really don't need to state the obvious, how he runs the New Jersey mafia, extorts people and kills others for a living, and I am just the CEO of a small company. Our similarities begin from there, including his handful of close companions following his lead each and every day in their effort to deliver on the expectations set forth by the New York home office. The way he terrorizes the FBI reminds me of my own antics within the multihousing industry itself. His incomparable generosity with his family members, though the frequent priority for the enterprise gets in the way, reminds me of my own my immediate associates and working environment dedication. I love how he does whatever is necessary to get the job done, and no matter what he delivers on the expectation. I certainly appreciate the personal anxiety he suffers daily, as my own burden is frequently enough to move me to tears and then some. I am not exactly sure why I have such an affinity for this character, knowing what he really represents. I guess it is his live or die connection to his business which strikes such a personal cord with me, feeling like I do today, I know that there is nothing between me and Ellipse.

Clutter, we all have it one form or another. For some it is house-based, for others it is the inevitable lack of focus and procrastination, and yet it takes on other forms as well. But, either way, clutter kills passion. All that positive energy gets blocked, because stuff just gets in the way, we don't get what we want, our passion disappears, and then we use whatever means remain to complain. I would rather confront is what is in my path, clear it, and move on. Kinda like the car parked on my driveway last month January 14th CEO Blog Post. Sure, sometimes it includes confrontation, sometimes it includes being mean as hell, and sometimes it just takes drawing attention to the blockage in communication, participation and commitment. No matter what it is - I am passionate about EVERYTHING I do, Work, interests, people, entertainment, My God, and living. Anyone who knows me well enough will agree. I am a “Katie Bar the Door, cause I am coming through”, good, bad or indifferent (well there never really is an indifferent, is there???) type of person.

As I hung up the conference bridge connection tonight at 6:10pm I noted to my associate Susan Wilson that we had been on this call, and in this management meeting, for 5 hours and 47 minutes to be exact. Dear Lord, I remembered a couple of times where we all broke to get something to drink, use the bathroom or walk out of office, prior to Lee and I reaching over the table to stick the other person in the eye with the closest sharp object. But it was just unfathomable that nearly six hours rolled by and no one was done talking. How does that work? I mean really. We've been working on the arduous details for creating a successful client management and sales organization for 2010 and this was one of many meetings. At one point today, the discussion was so heated that Richard came in and told us in the room and the parties on the phone that the masses were getting restless. Frankly, I didn't care. I was hell bent and determined to come up with a plan that worked for all parties, inclusive of the company and the employee base. And, it was going to come to fruition in short order. What I wasn't gonna to do was revisit last year where each and every month we lit a candle down at the nearest Catholic Church for God to look down upon us with blessings and riches. Economy no excuses.

I owed one of my guys an apology, for being especially harsh in the meeting this morning about coming unprepared. I stood there this evening in the copy room with tears in my eyes, disclaiming my forgiveness, all the while hating myself for being a chick. Sucks, especially since an overzealous male executive would never even consider exposing their personal vulnerabilities like that, but I am what I am, a cuddly female grizzly bear, with some very sharp teeth. Break ‘em down, build ‘em up. Give ‘em direction, give them vision and look for them to deliver on your notions. Many people think that my thinking is so advanced, and that my explanations esoteric to the light that only a small group can actually grasp my eloquence. (How much on the scrabble board would that be worth?) I try to be a simpleton in my explanations, simultaneously while I try to give folks the big picture, ‘cause that I the way I like it myself. Where does what I am doing fit in the grand scheme of things? Gosh for not being one who likes programming, I guess I would be a good team member for a really huge development project. I could build my section to specifications and be done with it all neatly falling together in to a complete application.

Here of late it brings a chuckle when I view the tired faces within my office. I've said this before, but with the renewed sense of energy for the New Year, we've all been operating on full cylinders since the first day of January.  Someone said to Richard “Can you help me with umptysquat?” He responded with a simple how about tomorrow morning when I am not so tired. Unfortunately, the very same person asked Susan Wilson and I the same question, only to get the same answer. The entire situation reminded of when I moved down from Minneapolis to Dallas, where every sunny day I felt compelled to make the best of it. Until I realized that it is sunny 97% of the time around here. Like back then, I think many of us have hit the proverbial wall over the past day or so.

U.S. Cyber Warfare Coming Soon...... an interesting video composite and a thought provoking discussion -

Ok, so here you go. The first 8.33% of your annual budget and operating revenues are to be delivered in the next four days. Don't know about you, but I am certainly not prepared for that endeavor. Can I take a pass on my turn? How about adding my overages or variances into the next 9% category?

Ok, tonight Lee and I decided we were going to take our newly developed executive team to dinner at Charlie Palmers down on Main Street in down town Dallas. What a great setting, the personal dining room with all 11 of us in tow. During the first course, we were so very polite and reserved in our efforts to impress the ones next over, only to become the tawdry group we were, especially by the time the time the evening ended. It was memorable. We laughed until we could barely move and as embarrassed as we for each other, the humor just kept getting worse. Till Lee kicked us out, all of us, not really ready to go, but her mind's eye knowing how much many of had drank and cavorted. I loved that our VP of Operations, Kristi Johnston, was in person tonight with us all, since I miss her sooooo much in our daily value, frequently with the client perspective in place. Gosh, she looked just beautiful.. I realized that it had been a couple of months since I'd seen her last, and I miss her dearly. When she was attending adult college a couple of years ago, she and I would get together on each Wednesday evening after completion of a course exam, we would party, hard. And on those days we would talk about work until the sun rose in the night… Tonight, she made me laugh on more than one occasion, making me realize how much we have changed.

My neighbor didn't come over for our usual Sunday night meal, obviously she needed a break.  I had to have a nap to today after the escapade of work at the office yesterday.  Even the dog went to bed early. I got up this morning just fine, but by the time church was over, I lost whatever energy I was toting about.  Church was work as the minister exclaimed that she was really struggling to please everyone, my church associate Kristin shared at lunch that shw was aggrevated her new classes at school and Richard told me we actually carried 1300 lbs. of batteries, rather than 500 yesterday. That's fine, my nap was fabulous. Nothing memorable, I just awoke after two and a half hours with some form of a feeling of accomplishment, similar to what I felt when I came home last night. Thought that was strange, feeling like I did something just by napping. Lee says something about her ears ringing when she is tired, I noticed that today as I was driving, realizing later I never turned the radio on.  Must have really been tired. A good tired, as for me a good bout of physical labor does my body right. I told Richard today, I should not have been the CEO of a technology company, but a landscaper or housekeeper, instead. (Yeah right, maybe I'll work in my own yard instead.)

Today Richard and I had lunch with my neighbor, prior to going to the office to work. See we decided to this was the right day to install 500 lbs. of battery replacements on our server battery backup system and I wanted to clean the carpets in the office. Richard certainly found it funny that I negotiated my time to help with his battery install if he would help with wagging buckets of dirty water to and from the kitchen as I clean the carpets.  Tonight I can barely move, as my physical being is completely destroyed feet first. The bath I drew was not nearly hot enough to clear away the aches from my elbows and knees, but my sense of accomplishment helps dramatically.

An interesting week at best.

A few things really stood out on my path to successful stardom. This week was especially entertaining or aggravating, not sure. Here we go, in chronological order –

1. I heard from that snappy woman from the Mercy Wine bar this past week ago Thursday and the one whom I ran into at the gallery event last Saturday. You know the one; she was so busy telling me about wines from France in an effort to impress me and the one I responded to with “Oh, I am just working on the west coast of this continent first.” She determined that I was connected to JD Miller the painter, who surely operates in a solid high wealth network, but I am not sure if she really understood that I am just an impressed follower of this talented guy. Simply put, she emailed me a hello and thanks for the other night, inclusive of her sales pitch about benefits management. At that point I was done… Oh, BTW – if you do hear from Andy, I still think she is adorable.

2. I got invited to participate in a professional women's Board of Directors business development group this week; via voicemail on Monday, letter based invitation on Tuesday, office visit to the unavailable on Wednesday, and phone on Thursday. The call on Thursday went like “Why do you want to get with me?” “We engage women in the area to participate in critiquing other women businesses, by creating a team of professionals who also own successful businesses.” “Oh… (long story short) I have, in the past 5 weeks, split one of my core executive's positions into three jobs, promoted my co-founder to President, hired two new senior executives, promoted 4 people into Director level positions and redirected my business development team into something completely new. I am not sure if I can take a group of associated individuals I don't know telling me what to do next or what I am not doing right now, without my head exploding” “ Oh, I can see that, thanks for visiting with me. And, good luck.”

3. I asked to participate the next day in a Third Party Board of Director's conference. “Why would I want to get paid to advise another company on how to be successful, when I have one right now who needs tending?” was my response to her call. “Why not call one of the banking institutions I know, they like to sponsor this type of stuff.” But, when you call they are hard pressed to support these businesses' cause they don't have the underwriting capability. Except Jake Hardin, Frost Bank, Mansfield, TX. He is the only guy in banking who doesn't make crap up just to get you to make your deposits in his bank. Oh, I referred him to this gal, he actually appreciates female entrepreneurs. And, I didn't have to sell my company to work with him.

4. I am writing an article for Multihousing Professional Magazine. Lee recently encouraged me into this philosophy that socio-economic management is good for the renters, the metro area and the asset holder, simultaneously. Silly me. I called the city of Dallas community development office, the one who funds property updates and such with county/federal/local grants with a high level perspective. Interestingly enough, the lady I got on the phone was very literate, and interesting. She deferred me to the Assistant City Manager and/or the Director of Umpty Squat. Cool, I am gonna get some real vision for the city. You know, theory, The “Invisible hand of Government” or is it the “Stronghold of the throats of property owners” that will deliver the city district with common standards of collective improvement? I realized how nervous I was with that acceptance of the call back. “I am not sure if I am the one to conduct the interview… maybe you should do it?” I said to the Publisher of Multihousing Professional Magazine, “I am just a business person, trying to get a nut.” To the response, “Lisa, you are a smart, applied business person, and I know you like when it becomes uncomfortable.” “ Yes, but...” Ok, she had a point.

5. I know and appreciate that I am intimidating with regards to people contacts. My hard, take no prisoners' style, often my basis of intimidation which I really do I hate about myself, thanks dad. But, the best to me was the other day when I was visiting with an industry contact who said during our communications “my children's ex-mother…” then correcting himself with “oh, I mean my ex-wife.” See we set up an apppointment with the intentions of working collaberatively in our sales efforts, then as usual, I put myself out there and they either don't reciprocate in kind or fall in step with their management. This guy was of the second type, shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, look around the room... I thought, “Shit, this is incredibly funny and unfortunate at the same time.” Here I am, trying to build trust for a common client relationship and what do I get… but then again, that was just hysterical. Enough said.

6. When it comes to this blog, I found out today that my employees read it, clamoring to gain my attention long enough to be recognized for their hard worked heartfelt contribution. They've told me this personally, that it make them proud to a part of such energy. A getting their name in lights sort of stuff. So when you add my message of commitment to continueto do said, in my post the day before yesterday it made them even more interested. I exclaimed my person distain for not being able to accept their efforts in a positive light, for whatever risk is involved going forward, is just ridiculous. Regardless, I will continue to say “Thanks”, for both the entertainment factor, such as someone who pushed their broken down car up the parking garage two landings to find an open double parking space, allowing them to push the vehicle safely into said, without causing damage to the car next over. Or, the ones who really do impress me personally with their extreme contribution towards making us better. For those it is only fair I can call them out publicly for being so great.When it comes down to it, it's both types relationships that make Ellipse the best place to work for, ever.

7. Khan, our 5 year long programming employee asked me tonight if when we were going public. Interesting, since we only have to be $5M to do so….

8. / Today, Lee announced at 4:15pm pulled the entire company into the conference room to anounce that the entire company was going to Sherlock's Pub for happy hourm, until ofice close, at 6pm. There we went, each and every person instructed to leave, collectively, by the noted time. Man, that couldn't be the any better. I F'n loved every minute of it, all 46 of us who showed up for the last hour or so such a crazy week. It too reminded me of when Richard said to me “Lisa, do you remember that time Lee did that last time? You said, “And not it's now Tuesday.” Indicative of the Friday happy hour; which turned into the Thursday happy hour, followed by the Wednesday happy hour, onto now to include Tuesday and all the days thereafter that week. Well, Richard, Tony Roma's closed their restaurant around the corner many years ago, and now we have 45 employees. A far cry from the 6 or so we had back then…

Why do they call it being politically correct, when I am not running for public office? “Lisa, you are not being politically correct…” or “Lisa, you can't say do that, or say that, or be that.”  Someone in the company, industry, or the world might not like what you've done or said.  As politicians continue to do ass stupid stuff on a daily basis, I find the entire process of being in the business world interesting as ethical hard working professionals get the tagged with an acronym for the other guys' behavior. So today's topic was my blog, being inappropriate for the business I founded. Oh, let me say that again… I own just about 50% of this enterprise, personally, and I am not appropriate for my own company. Whoa… yes, as in slow the horses here.

I came home tonight at 7pm, the earliest in what I would guess 3 months…or maybe a day or two buried somewhere in my schedule where I didn't get tagged for happy hour or some impromptu dining event. Truthfully, I was speaking to Jerry at Glazer Wholesale liquors about an event I am planning for the first weekend in March at my home. He is working on locating a vintner for my open house “Close encounters of the cultural kind”, where I am presenting an artist, executive chef and vintner for an evening of great art supported with food and wine pairings. More to come… if you're in Dallas on March the 6^th and you want to meet the terror behind this industry blog along with other professionals in the business, email me and I will put you on invite list. So here we are, talking about wine and Sonoma Cuttrer Chardonnay, which is served nice and cold, at where? Blue Ocean in Lewisville www.blueoceansushilover.com , the best sushi joint in the metro area, a quick call to my neighbor “I'm craving sushi, call me.” Crap, the men's tennis team is looking for a fourth tonight and you're not available? Cheese, crackers, diet soda and an episode of the Sopranos, for me, I guess.

I've been the social director for Bhante Wimala , my Buddhist monk associate who is coming to Dallas on the weekend of February 13^th. He will speak to my employees on Monday in exchange for a trip here and a booked education session at a church or two. So here we go… three pastors, a couple of adult education coordinators and a personal call or two, I am getting some headway. His humanitarian efforts make an extremely interesting story, add his perceptions on healthy living and loving those about you, it's worth a couple of dedicated hours.

I've referenced my employee Naveen Nawaz previously, she is the absolutely beautiful (inside and out) young professional graphic designer from Pakistan, recently promoted to our Creative Director. I noted how she was in her home country for about 7 weeks over the holidays. I miss her drastically when she is not at work, and I worry like her mother when she is overseas. Thrilled to have her in our midst once again, I inquired about her trip. “Don't you worry when you are there?” She replied, sure, but you become acclimated to the daily bomb blasts and the street muggings after a few days. With that said, my heart stopped for a blessing to God for having her here in front of me, healthy and smiling. She continued to explain that the terrorists in Karachi are really Indian based, even though the world says they are members of Islam. See the Koran does not endorse killing, regardless of what prescribes that type of behavior and the world is being lead into believing that Muslims are behind today's terrorist network. Peaceful living should be the standard, and the radicals are shattering that all to hell. “Why don't people know this?” “Come on Lisa, it's the news… bomb blasts and killings deliver economics.”

“Lisa, you don't know me, but my name is Don and I was searching on the Internet for a gentleman named Keith Caven, and your blog came up. I started reading your blog, and frankly I was so enthralled that I just had to call you, personally.” He continued with how he read about Ellipse's lawsuit against this individual over the past, nearly, 30 months now, and he just wanted to thank me for being the one human being who was willing to invest the $160K to make an example of his unethical behavior. I shared with him that we were now into over a quarter of a million dollars and that we were now waiting for the judge to make a verdict where the jury was unable to come to a unified decision. Asking where he was from and what he does for a living, he shared that he is a marketing executive, and he spends his time between Florida and Hong Kong. And, that was 3:30am in Asia and that he couldn't end his day (night) without reaching out to me to share how we are kindred spirits, a world apart, while both being entrepreneurs by day and social militants for the business-oppressed by night. He continued to comment on he was just enthralled with my stories and experiences and it was just pleasure to read from another's heart, such as mine. This call was truly one of my best; I was thrilled to actually speak to a stranger who read my post. Since each and every night I sit at my computer and call out to the Internet ethers with a message or two from the day's experiences. I told him I write because I love it, I share because I am certain there are others out there dealing with the same experiences, I document because sometimes the shit is just so outrageous that I just can't help but cover it like a reporter. He apparently had his version with Mr. Caven and his questionable behavior some time ago, and he, unlike me, was not able to pull some money from the mattress to show the world how serious he was in saving face. He congratulated me for being an aggressive woman of business who would not hesitate to show the future someone just on how far I would go to protect our company's Intellectual Property. Speaking of which after 2.5 years our Relate 24/7 software program was just provided its federal copy write, whew-whew.

Tonight was the Golden Globe Awards on television, an interesting mix of talent, personalities and style. How many of us sat in our homes, dressed in whatever we were wearing, as we critiqued all that was on the screen? The guys, with their un-manicured beards, long hair and perpetual messiness, man… did they brush their teeth when showering prior to? And, on to the women, who were not wearing the right color, dress style, hair design or shoes.  Really… one can only imagine what they are doing for themselves prior to the event tonight, only to be shredded by the general US population… and critiqued by every DJ in America on morning radio, myself included.  When it comes down to it, I really hate that for myself in general, can you say jealous? Let's be truthful here.

This morning I awoke and ran to my computer for a quick review of the BWI (Blogging While Intoxicated) post from last night. Not bad considering the shear amount of back spaces, mis-spellings, and retypes I needed to punch the darn thing out last night with that one eye open. I have no misgivings for what I said regarding the corporate Anti-Christ. Yes, I said bad things about them and since they've compiled a full electronic profile of my shopping habits, elements of social interest, news items and of course where I live, with my home proudly included in Google Maps street view; I am just hoping I don't get their guy in the black jacket and dark glasses standing at my door some late night with a pen sized memory clearer. Oh well, that won't be the last time I BWI, nor a rant about Google.

Bhante Wimala, a Theravada Buddhist Monk from Sri Lanka called yesterday to say hi and say he was coming to Texas in mid-February. He and I have been friends since my first trip to Prague in September 2007. He makes me smile, laugh and conscience of the utter appreciation for what I have. He has been an international humanitarian for over 20 years now, and at 50 he is in the best shape of anyone I know. He is not of this earth, just a few feet above, as our materialist world concerns are completely not in his realm. I was sharing with Jennifer Bird about my call. She reminded me of a mid-December call in St. Thomas discussing an issue with his Relate 24/7 account, which we modified so he could keep in touch with his followers. Jennifer communicated with him in an attempt to sooth his aggravation on why the system had a technical glitch the previous day, she proceeded to explain how mad he was and he told her that he was not interested in speaking to her further. “Man, you know you're having a bad day when a Buddhist Monk yells at you!” Of which I nearly died laughing, knowing how strong he is personally and physically, while attempting to explain how impatient he can get. I shared he was going to be in Dallas on February 15^th and he will be at our office to meet our employees and speak to them about his work. I know you shouldn't refer to a Buddhist Monk as a “cute”, but he is when wearing that sarong and his sandals with socks when it's cold. He asked if I would be returning to Prague this summer, of which I immediately affirmed and he responded “YES!!!” in a loud tone. That made me happy, knowing of all the people in the world in which he can and has spent time with, he is excited to see me.

My neighbor is a regional director for a national contact lens company. Over the past five months she's held an open sales territory and thus the associated employee company car's been hovering around our houses until the position is to be refilled. After leaving the car in front of my house for a month, I offered to park it in my empty garage. Mid-December in an attempt to use the car, the transmission seized up and it got stranded on my driveway. After several polite attempts at a solution to get it removed, I finally blew up at my neighbor early yesterday morning. “What is it going to take to get this GD car off my driveway?” Which, of course turned, into a full-on yelling match, mostly on my part as I attempted to explain the history of the machinery on my pallet of land. “The car will be moved today between 3-4!” When I stopped home at 5pm the car was still there, which became fodder to the parking lot smoking crowd as I exclaimed “The car is still there!” Here is what they concluded as solutions to the problem –

January- a new year, a fresh focus at the office, and a new season of the Bachelor/Bachelorette. How lucky for all parties involved… Yes, much to the dismay of my professional associates who can't fathom that I watch that mind wasting, sap dripping show. This time, tonight, was to even my own mortification as I professed my obsession with each season, now my being third. Gotta admit, what woman do you know that is not personally wishing in their hearts for a romantic, event filled dating process such as what these ladies and that single gent all get to participate in? Frequently, with a herd of the women competitors simultaneously. With each season being more over the top than previously, indicating the budget is going higher with each successful season. Ok, so I also saw that the Shark Tank was back, only at a new night, Friday, therefore I missed the premiere show. Yes, that is more my speed, but come on we all need some unreality, right? Now, I will certainly spend most of my efforts to see that show via that tiny little screen on the web. Yeah, I do have a DVR, but back to the Time Warner scenario and stereo re-build - the damn thing just doesn't work. Frequently skipping out on shows and deleting them if I manage to successful capture just an episode or two. Go Tivo or Uverse if you are so inclined, but TW, never really had much luck, even my on-demand is a dead duck.

This Sunday night's dinner was quiet, only my neighbor, with none of the Desperate Ex-Wives in tow. Thank God. I've been busy all day, church, grocery shopping, office work and of course, cleaning. The never ending cleaning, damn my parents and their compulsive cleanliness, a prisoner in my own life. All for a smudge on the counter, the floor hasn't been washed in three weeks, though the Roomba tends to it every day and God forbid should I not change the sheets on Sunday night. At task that remains, now that the blanket is washed on its second changing, couldn't let that go. Oh well, we all come with some form of parental influence, my heaviest is the compulsive cleaning and picking up, guess it could be worse. Reminds me of the trip in the USVI where we were at that home we rented, and I didn't have to do a thing as I looked around the room, blind to the dust, shoes lying around and the lack of vacuuming. What a gift, guess I didn't really realize what I was experiencing at the time.

So tonight the movie was a delight. Nora Ephron , of Sleepless in Seattle and You've Got Mail, was the director and her signature style reigns though recognizably easy via enjoyable storylines and character development. The movie was soft hearted and touching, especially to an entrepreneur like myself, as I could not help but share their many disappointments, personally, though my own experiences and activities. The irony behind the blog and the way the young Julie mirrored the iconic Julia, daily though her cooking was so very close to home. Lee says she never reads my blog, I guess for the same reasons I never read her Facebook postings. For what we have put each other through over the past 13 years, is all this just a bit too trivial? Or, is some of it just a bit too painful to revisit? As I was yelling at the television screen this evening when Julie's husband told her it was too much and he was leaving… or the never ending rejections Julia received in her effort to get her book published. Speaking from personal experience to the above, there are few with the strength to stick it out to the end of the vision, and add the never ending threat of bankruptcy or failure, it is no wonder relationships don't last. I couldn't help but reflect on the duality behind my own experiences with Lee, knowing she is still here in my life, but definitely not in the same role she once held. Doesn't mean I don't love her as much, and I am so indebted to her for it all, especially today.

I've got to say, I am not one for pop culture. No, I don't have an IPhone, have not seen the movie Avatar, and I've never experienced a segment of The Sopranos on HBO. Until today. I was at Half Priced Books the other day getting 2010 wall calendars for the office, and I thought I would search for a used version of season one of Sex in the City. Admittedly I think I have seen two of those shows during the number of years it ran, but only by accident. The desperate Ex-Wives who live with me on Wisteria Lane have not only seen the show religiously, but each of them regularly recants their favorite scene of some named female character in relation to some activity we're discussing. It must have been good as that set is still not to be found, so when I stumbled across this series, I snatched it. Just so I could continue in conversation should the show surface again in the future.

Today, I think my hang over finally appeared from my evening out on Thursday night at the Mercy Wine Bar in North Dallas. A swanky establishment with low lights, funky cocktail tables and seating that comes ridiculously close to sitting on the floor. This evening was because of a gal I met at the local chamber of commerce a couple of months ago where we spent the hour together sitting in the last table in the room heckling the two state representatives and senator. We decided it was so much fun that we would get together again in the future, hoping for an evening of the same eye watering, laugh induced coughing entertainment as that impromptu meeting. That would be the other day where we both agreed to bring a friend and engage in a table top of four and get to know each other on a more personal basis. Since I can't keep anything to myself I ended up inviting a handful of my other friends to meet her as well, with her bringing two sidekicks we ended up with an eclectic group of strangers connected by a thread, began what I am thinking will become some new friendships. My co-traveler from my recent trip to St. Thomas, Sue, was along for the ride, as well as Elysa Rice's mom, Elexis. Heather Robinson had been in town all week so of course she was on my invite list, with an impromptu inclusion of our Operations Manager, Kristi Hinkle.

My associate Linda Hoffman, publisher of Multihousing Professional Magazine, and I were visiting today, the first in nearly a month, and I was sharing with her my philosophy on changing the momentum of the economic malaise we have suffered over these months. I touched on the concept the other day with my rant about our industry asset management techniques and the detriment it puts the social swatch that reside in our apartment communities nationwide. I am getting closer to perfecting my business ideologies and I found myself recanting my version of economic stimulus to just about anyone who would listen over the past few days. You know - taking a reasonable profit margin while reinvesting in talent development, industry education and asset management. Simple right? Well, sorta…

At breakfast this morning with Lee and a couple of our out of town employees my blog became the topic of the hour. Obviously with so much personal information which fuses my details, Lee threatened to remove my blog from the Ellipse website and put it under my alternative URL, www.imstartingashitstorm.com. Which I don't think is really necessary, but I've got to say she has a point; a high percentage of my written content is really about my personal life and not really so much about multifamily news and its affiliated details. Today she asked if I wouldn't take a few minutes to discuss the real perspective on our illustrious industry, instead. The fact that single handily our industry is deteriorating the living experience for an entire class of citizens, all for the financial betterment of the Select few owners holding the asset in tow.

Ok, so tonight when I got home I pulled the reed brush entry mat off the patio bench from where I placed it a few days ago to dry out. Ok, so it's not exactly dry and now as I threw it down in front of the back patio door it held its frozen horseshoe shape with its middle up in the air. The dog looked at me like “I've got to walk over that? What in the hell?” Man, I gotta say, since Climategate hit the news our weather has turned in to Missouri or maybe Oklahoma, at best. We've had weather in the early 30s and snow twice since Christmas Eve. Now, I personally don't mind the weather, but my friends commented on how they moved to this part of the country for the mild weather are not exactly thrilled. Know one thing, this is definitely not one for the bugs, and what will soon be more landscaping losses across the metro area which will likely result from the expected frost later this week. Thought Heather Robinson was going to crack in half while waiting for me to get her at the airport tonight, California Girl.

I needed some humor today. Uhm yes, I did my best today to stay out of everyone's way with regards to their jobs and what we can accomplish during the first 6 hours after a 10 day holiday. Per Richard's IM -

What is this world coming to?

The "Dummies" series is highly successful, and has spawned an extensive product line as well as dozens of books. But the "Dummies" series has gone too far, has jumped the shark, with this title. Pregnancy for Dummies. Do we really need to encourage dummies to reproduce...?

I knew it was going to the a crappy evening when I shoved the kitchen glass into what would appear to be the biggest half-melted, rock solid block of ice in my neighbor's ice maker. “You broke another glass? Good Lord, you've been here less than five minutes and you break another glass… how many is it now? Five?!?” I wanted to respond, “Uh, over the past 2 years? Maybe… but, I guess you should tell us, since you are counting.” Her reference being to the number of wine glasses I obliterated over the years, including the one that just folded in my hands as I pulled it out of the cabinet, obviously from some pre-existing hairline crack in the stem. See I have a rule, don't wash wine glasses when drunk, and I don't care if we have to switch to plastic tumblers when I have guests. It's just safer that way, that, and having the O2xygen Balloon Wine Glasses made by Lenox. Honestly, tonight was just destined with a rapid ending to evening, right off the start.

Earlier I was visiting with my hairdresser as he was freeing me those extra volumes of hair which appeared during my trip to the Virgin Islands. While doing so, he shared with me the burden of support he has been dealing with his mother in her attempt to recover from the stroke she suffered earlier this spring. Physically she recovered within short order, being a healthy 70 year old woman; however, her inability to form speech still remains. She is able to speak, but the connection between her speech center in her brain and her mouth never quite back to normal. He shared how this lady really can't be left alone during the day, as she can't communicate her needs, nor, her ability to summon help if necessary. As debilitating as this medical event has been, they remain hopeful with her skills returning, but it is expected to take three and a half more years. He cited how he regularly takes her to therapy and some community center across town in hopes that she will become engaged into some recovery pattern. He explained that his parents are divorced and his siblings have move away from his childhood home, and he remains the sole lifeline for his mom. A difficult personal experience and what seems like an unfathomable sacrifice on both parties.

We are the luckiest generation in the past century, ‘cause we have experienced the changing of a new century, decade and year all in the past 12 hours. Add DVRs, smart phones, the IPod, Susan Boyle, and Viagra - wow! But then include Y2K, Swine Flu, Rwanda, September 11^th and the biggest economic meltdown in our recordable lifetime - oops.  Either way, I am grateful, no, not just grateful, but excruciatingly appreciative for my life, my health, my financial success, Lee, my friends and family, my experiences, and my God.  And, I am appreciative to have reached my age of 47. To be old enough to have maturity to engage in life, while holding the vitality to participate with virility. I mean really, how many of us continue to say “Oh, I'm gonna when…” or “Oh, I would love to do that, but…” and how about “Sorry I can't because…” Man, the last one I hate the most. Like when I call and say, “Hey I just got last minute tickets to umptysquat, you available?”  That's too bad; I'm going regardless of if I am by myself.  

I've been back a work for exactly one week now, and there are a few items of interest that I thought I would post today.

2. I got a copy of the recent Multihousing Professional Magazine in the mail. I've got to say, Linda Hoffman, Publisher, is really churning out some interesting stuff. Yes I know, I am personal friends with her, and yes, I do editorial contribution to the magazine, but honestly… her “cut to the quick” style of writing is bringing some sincere value to the social conversations within our illustrious industry. I loved this issue's publisher's notes in the front of the magazine, especially since I was just on the phone discussing Kafka's short story with her and that was the opening line within her commentary. The story that summarizes the Tishman Speyer organization spiraling decline into 2010, comparing it to the cover story featuring the same in May 2007. Ouch. But then again, Chris Finetto and I were just speaking about pulling off the “Financial Band-Aid” and getting some air on the wound to begin the healing process. If you are not on the high demand mailing address list with her organization, please by all means take the time to read the electronic version at www.multihousingpro.com/

There were probably many, many times this year when I may have
disturbed you,
troubled you,
pestered you,
irritated you,
bugged you,
or got on your nerves....

So today I just wanted to tell you..........

Ok, so what do the Desperate Ex-wives on Wisteria Lane do when it snows in Dallas a second time in less than a week? Invite everyone, once again, within stumbling distance to your neighbor's house, defrost whatever meat is available, cook a family style meal while downing several bottles of wine. I have decided, based on the fact that one of my female neighbors took a nap at the dinner table last night that we need to rename my neighbor's house to the “Delta House”. Only Dean Wormer is not available to keep a lid on the antics in my neighborhood… I mean really, how old are we? And who exactly is in charge here?

I recently bought the first season DVD set of the Thirtysomething a few weeks ago. It is a library must for anyone who enjoyed that show back in the 80's. Not just for the clothing and hairstyles those of us from that era we miss, but for the terrific writing, deep character inclusions and engaging story lines. I absolutely loved that show and television today, with all its reality TV, just doesn't come to that level of high art. What's funny is that this show reminds me of the group in my neighborhood, only now with the 20 years subsequently added to their ages. The show debuted in 1987 and the cast was in their thirties, I was in my twenties, but everything they did resonated with me personally. The third show in the series deals with Hope Stedman and her unjustified, unappreciated, difficult relationship she shares with her mother. As I watched I reflected on my own version of the same with my mom. My mom is really a terrific lady, being beautiful, smart and sweet in her own way, but somehow I really struggle being comfortable when I am around her. Not exactly sure, why, it's just that way. I love that circle of friends in the show as they tumble through life's each day, including each other in their realities, good or bad. It's like back in February when my neighbor's mom died in an unfortunate accident, tripping into the foyer of her new apartment in Dallas the night she moved up from Houston. I was at her side each day and night for the five days with her mom in a comma, and there when we unplugged the respirator with her six friends at their side. We will be bound for life due to that event, and though I would like no better than to still have her mom alive instead, I wouldn't trade that experience for the world. I know there will be more of those types of bonding events in our collective lives, kinda like the movie The Big Chill. But one thing is for sure, I am extremely blessed to have this group as the ones who will be there for each of us, and for that I thank God.

Well maybe, just let the holidays be over instead. 

It's nice to be back in front of the key board documenting the comings and goings of those in my life. This holiday/vacation has been much needed for so many reasons; this year's wag has really been a bitch, the wine brigade nearly killed me, and I need a break from my daily stress of being a business person in the toughest business environment in 70 years. Then add the never ending entertainment here on Wisteria Lane, our being the “Desperate Ex-wives”, my attention span has been limited at best. For those 1,000 daily visitors who follow this blog, seeking what I am attempting to deliver, an insightful basis of humor about life and being an entrepreneur, I apologize that I have not been available for the past few days. As Richard says “Blogs can be fun, and if the writer is consistent in their content and recurrent availability, then readership will remain high.” Uh, ok, so simply put, deliver interesting material on a reliable basis and folks will remain engaged. Jennifer Bird told me just prior to vacationing that there was someone from Europe and East Asia on the blog that day. How on earth they found me… I am not sure, but I do know the visitors continue to climb. Hopefully 2010 will deliver just as much pure, unmitigated, classless stuff for me to write about. Then again, I guess since I am in the center of it all, it's safe to say things should remain pretty much status quo.

Ok, so I returned on Wednesday night, ahem, Thursday morning at 1:15am. The weather in Miami was fine; it was the plane from Washington DC that was struggling to reach its on-time departure. Wow, talk about a white Christmas? Practically every part of the country was socked with snow, even Dallas! Never in the history of weather keeping has Dallas experienced a white Christmas Eve, and I gotta say it was SO very cool. Yes, some folks did not make it the gathering at my neighbor's house, ‘cause here in Texas, snow means icy roads and idiots who don't know how to drive. Those within a 5 mile radius decided to chance driving, or in my case, walking next door. Albeit, after the mass volumes of wine, food and celebration there was some discussion about finding the male neighbor who lives on the other side of her house in the bushes, rather than safely in bed. I've lived in this neighborhood for over 5 years now, and it just gets better all the time. With all these great looking, successful, and available (well, some by choice are not), older women hovering about, we've picked up a number of single gents in attendance here of late. I've gotta say, I personally like an even mix of men and women in all my social interaction, especially at work. The interactive exchange between men and women is much more interesting and colorful than an exclusively single sex. event  Or, as my neighbor refers to a gathering of more than four females, Magpies, which are noisy cackling birds. When this is the case, you can pretty much count on her short tenure at the event, or some lame excuse as to why she is unavailable and not to be expected in attendance.

Since my return home, all my associates wanted the complete summary of my escapes since my travel mates left on the previous Saturday. (Knowing full well I would be in St. Thomas on my own and left to my own devices.) Where my friend Linda Hoffman, traveling to Greece and Istanbul, texts me a great cultural photo of the old woman and the donkey in the market sun; I send images of myself with me on a moped and a crash helmet (see the previous post). I recanted the time in the bar with the 4 male college students as I engaged them with my skills at the trashed Connect Four game on the bar top. And, my incessant heckling over their age and current life styles. Knowing how they discounted me as the older lady in the bar, I had to laugh later at the comment I made to one of these kids was “Oh, I get it, when you graduate with your PHD in physics, then you will become a physician. Right?” To which he responded, “I'm outta here.”

Folks can't believe I went deep sea fishing, and that Captain Chris and I caught a couple of nice 10-12 lb. Jack Tunas. Especially with my flaming red finger nail polish still intact which was recently redone. I've got to say, any women who wants a new hairstyle in fast order should head to the Caribbean for a couple of weeks, my hair grew yards while I was gone. I commented to my neighbor that if my hair got any longer, I too could put up some dregs like the assistant shipmate on the sail boat we chartered while gone. Speaking of which, I really chuckled when my neighbor recanted how she just blindly forwarded the pics from our day out on the sail boat with Captain Pat, inclusive of an image of the co-boatman. Obviously, her professional network was interested in hearing more about the hair covered tanned guy. “Should have figured that you would snap a picture of the crew member in dregs when you commandeered the camera, Lisa.”

Lee commented that my office was filled with boxes of stuff, holiday gifts, food packages, promotional stuff, cards, and a big box from Sri Lanka. I knew exactly what the box from Sri Lanka was, it held my two Buddhas that I purchased while I was there, which have been making their way across the world in cargo for the past 3 months. I was so excited, especially since I wrote them off a mere 3 weeks ago, as lost or stolen. Even the credit card company couldn't find the record of purchase when I called, since I don't keep receipts for my personal purchases. See, I was planning on giving my friend, Anne Sadovsky, one of these gorgeous, hand crafted pieces of wood artwork for the holiday. I shared my recent disappointment in their loss, which made our collective excitement that much better when I arrived on Christmas day with statue in hand. Yes, as my neighbor said “You must just live right.” Reflecting on that statement, I must say, I sure do try to do so. Not sure if I accomplish it all the time, but I maybe I get credit for putting forth the best of intentions, regardless.

The past two days were spent shopping on the islands of St. Thomas and St. John, with my neighbor and a fellow traveler. The variances between the two islands is extreme, St. Thomas being the Mecca of world class jewelry and watch hockers; while St. John in is the home of local artisans and designer boutiques for home décor and furnishings. Good thing we didn't stay in St. Thomas both days, otherwise I would likely feel inclined to purchase a nice, yet expensive piece of gold for my wrist or finger. I had to laugh on Thursday as we drove round for a full hour to find the only available parking space in the city, desperate as we became, we even attempted to scrape up an illegal parking space at one of the major hotels though we are not guests.  The shopping here is extreme, with high wealth travelers targeted by the finest of international brands on every corner. The irony behind the front door greeters as they tried to move each passing tourist into their shop… “I make you good price.” “Come inside and look around, everything is 80% off.” Or the better yet bleached blond gentleman who declared “Step inside, give him my card and I get 50 cents.” “50 cents, really?” “Yep, and he has the best deals on the island.”

So completely opposite from the trip to St. John, the following day. A slow paced wag that started with a Bloody Mary and a beer chaser, followed by a “Painkiller”, the island specialty drink with the two gals working at the nearest fine jewelry shop.  When in the city limits of Cruz Bay, you are hard pressed to find anyone originally from the island. Most being casual visitors who never returned home, or others beckoned by an associate with the prospects of a job in the hospitality industry. It's fun to chat with the service people on their arrival stories here on the island, each coming from different states in the US and all in varied tenure as an island resident. All, captivated by the casual lifestyle and what would appear to be affordable rental housing. I couldn't help but notice that the folks that live here year round are not tanned like us visitors, I guess either choosing to be healthy or finding themselves working during the sunning times in the day.

My co-travelers are heading home today, I, choosing to remain till Wednesday late in the day. I Hotwired a cost effective hotel room at the Wyndham Sugar Bay Resort here on St. Thomas. I understand this is a really nice ocean side location and the $158.00 per night really can't be beat. Especially, considering the house we stayed at what a whopping $4,000.00 per week rental we all just shared. As I said previously, the place is really very nice and the view is just spectacular, but honestly, I just don't see the value and likely I will never return. I am better for traveling to new places and experiencing new cities. Now I can strike off St. Thomas and St. John, as well as last December's trip to the island of St. Lucia. The Caribbean is glorious, and the people are so very friendly.

I will be here in St. Thomas until Monday's checkout time, when I will head over to St. John for the balance of my trip. Tuesday afternoon I am chartering a deep sea fishing boat with Captain Chris, owner of the World Class Anglers fishing Tour Company. I was referred to him as the “best fishing guy on the island” by Kim the waitress at the Hightide Restaurant, right next to the ferry dock. I am really looking forward that event. The joke the other day with one of my girlfriends, who had rotator cuff surgery a mere 4 weeks ago, was that she should go along. That way when she catches the big fish, I can push her out of the way and wrestle it into the boat “for her”.  I am hoping also that I can wrangle an afternoon out of a scuba boat while I am here. I am not a certified diver, but I have done it many times in the past and I really prefer it to snorkeling, albeit, the dive typically is shallow.

Prior to leaving Dallas I stopped for a mani and pedi, only this time I choose shocking red as the color of choice. Interesting how men pick up on the nails and lack of wedding band. I chuckled when the guy at the store asked me if I wanted a ride to Sapphire Bay, ‘cause the taxi never seems to arrive. Or the local construction worker who hit on me yesterday on riding back on the ferry towards our hilltop home. He told me that he could really make this trip memorable… I'll bet. I am a bit disappointed that the polish does not last, with it being on just a week and the edges are already getting a bit rough. I did manage to smear a couple of fingers last Friday, so I have packed a bottle of the matching color I found at Walgreen's. With nothing on my list for the next few days, there will be plenty of time to take a swing at repairs.

That is what Captain Pat from her 44 foot sailboat, The Independence, said about today's culture of Americans and their inability to engage in self-reliance and personal endurance. “I recently spoke to an American boater who ran out of gas who actually called the Coast Guard to rescue them, because they ran out of gas… for heaven's sake they were in a sail boat. I just couldn't imagine that they asked the armed forces to bail them out of their stupidity. In my day…” As I calculated her tenure on the global seas, I was pleasantly surprised to see what in great health she was, and her 43 years behind the captain's wheel fared her well. How cool to converse with a lifetime sailor, and an woman, no less. Her simple haircut, smiling eyes and tanned, sun drenched skin only made her alore and stories from the heart more interesting and enduring. As she worked the boat today with the touch of fine art, only the most accomplished sailor is capable of, I could only dream of her experiences in the international oceans. Gosh, she was a mere 19 years old when she arrived in St. Thomas as a hired boat hand, never to leave the island, with exception of the next excursion plan in hand.

This afternoon as my trip mates dove into the turquoise waters for shoreline snorkeling and swimming, I sat under the canopy with "Captain Pat." We shared ideologies about life and business today, hers, being a one women tourist boating company with a retired husband who ran a marina and boating support company; and me, an entrepreneur on the Internet operating a software development company. We laughed heartedly when we compared our knowledge of computers and life… her being reality, and mine, being some where in-between virtual and the real thing.

I committed to a couple of things today' to recant the moment, last night when one co-traveler shot a spit wad into a battery operated electrified tennis racket shaped-bug zapper, and today when I would reference the website of my new found sailing friend, “Pat's Cruises”, www.independence44.us. And I guess, my personal reference on what a great time I had today.

Gosh, even this evening my neighbor commented on how “grumpy I was”, but in reality was so calmed down that I was closer to the sub-level of this house than I've ever been in my life ,with anyone… man, if I don't get my heartbeat up tomorrow I might just die.

A sad ending to such a great day…

That is what this place feels like with the past few days on the island burned into non-eventfulness with my three co-travelers. The house is large enough to provide personal space, but there is absolutely nothing to do, other than sit is in the sun, sit at the kitchen counter, sit in the living area or sit at the dinning room table. It is amazing what benign topics can be engaged when three seemingly strangers arrive together at some remote place in the world.

 There is this great discussion starting card set lying on the dinning room table just in front of the magnificent panoramic view, called TableTopics. http://www.tabletopics.com. Settling for no television, since they are all buried in the separated bedroom areas, we were forced to engage in simple conversation and self-entertainment after dinner. We shared our answers last night, followed up with another round of questions over an afternoon snack late today after sunning. Interesting questions like, “Would you live and differently if you didn't care what people thought?” Or, “What's your dream job?”, how about “Who's the most famous person you've ever met?” Icebreakers to say the least, but what becomes even more, a really simple way to get to know others on a more interesting level. Obviously, humorous details about ourselves will be exposed when sharing oblique elements of our personal and professional lives.

I feel a bit weird on a consistent basis, due to my extreme intellectual topics I find myself traversing with the others. Working at Ellipse provides volumes of opportunities to explore vocabulary, current events, global considerations and off handed Internet-based topics or stories. At work, and in my personal circle, I don't think twice about covering some extreme business mantra or applied ideological practice. Richard Jahnel, my CIO and long term friend, doesn't miss a step, ever, just adding to the depth of information and including his own elements of details which I've not been exposed to. One of my co-travelers even commented to me on the second day, “Wow, you're really well read.” I made some crack today about not reading, and my neighbor prompted me to admit that I read all the time, just in small increments and magazines. The more tasking the topic is, the more I like it. Like the book I brought on this trip. A Case for God, by Karen Armstrong. A 3 lb. hardback which reviews the role of God, and the basis of humanistic spirituality though the ages. This book not only covers the Christian influence, but also Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Daoism and the major forces in worldly theology. I was interested to read the era of reason, which started with the Greeks and the early Christian faith based reliance. Previously, I was lucky to read a college text book about the early Roman Catholic Church starting from the 12^th Century. I am one for spirituality, but really not so much for the dogma and societal control in which the shield of Christianity is often wielded in our lives.

Certainly my associates think I am weird for bringing such a tail. But as I stated to my neighbor last evening, I brought it on purpose because I was hoping I would have stints of hours in which I can tackle the historical ramifications in my mind undisturbed. While I am home, or functioning under the continuous threat of work related issues, it is difficult for me to assemble a block of personal attention/dedication to a topic. I am a compulsive cleaner and neat freak at home. Just as one of the Tabletopics cards requested, “What astrological sign are you, and what characteristics do you hold?” I screamed Virgo, while noting the above. Gotta say how great it is to be “home” with nothing to fix, pick up, clean or tend to. As I have written previously, my weekends are precious to me as I unwind, unteather and unravel the previously non-forgiving week I typically hold.

Villa de Papillion, located on the north side of the island of St. Thomas, is a gorgeous single family home overseeing the sapphire ocean from high a top the hill side. After traveling all day and night to arrive at paradise, I began my holiday vacation on late Saturday night. I slept nearly the entire day yesterday, exhausted from the bone crushing past week at work. My associates, consisting of my neighbor and two of her personal friends, certainly had a field day with my lack of engagement with the view, sun deck and pool. I explained that I would arrive mentally in the next 24 hours once my being caught up with the rest of the group. At one point, I exclaimed “Nobody has any idea how exhausted I am!” only to be responded with the option of a beer or wine… “Red or white?”

We left Saturday on the 7am flight, as planned, with my delivered 2.hours and 45 minutes of captured sleep. My neighbor and I, first to arrive, were in charge of the car, groceries, meeting the house guest escort to our destination and picking up the others at the airport later that evening. The second party, stalled in Puerto Rico due to lack of power at the St. Thomas airport, landed 1.5 hours late, island time being much more forgiving than the clock at home. With more wine than food in tow, the first evening everyone was giving their best swing at unwinding. The next afternoon, grocery shopping was in order, lots of food, snacks, with more beer and wine on the list. I've never been shopping with a group of people I hardly know. And based on everyone's oh ‘so polite and shy behavior, it was evident the others were thinking the same, as well. Dare I throw a bag of cheese curls in the cart, if no one else sees their value as a food stuff. How about that half pound of ham, when I would rather toss a pack of turkey in the cart? "Hey, I found a half gallon of rum for only $8 bucks, dude... what a buy!" Don't count on me for breakfast, hardly a lunch, with me opting for snacks and light food for sustenance prior to dinner. Decision made, cheese curls and white bread for P&J sandwiches. Move on to the butcher shop for great BBQ meats.

24 hours into the trip, I shared with my neighbor that I've not ever traveled with anyone other than my partner, co-workers and long standing friends. Not very comfortable with myself. Not wanting to look like an idiot right out of the box, I found my self checking behavior was in control during the first evening/day. I laughed at dinner when I shared how different it was to travel with professional women with financial stature and some how we would find common ground on the varied topics that would be tossed in to the conversation, Bill Clinton and the blue dress, included. A sudden rain shower forced us indoors, grabbing the remnants of the dinner platters, empty wine bottle and glasses. Settling in the living area with the Internet access and one of the co-travelers online dating results from her posting efforts earlier in the evening. The others gathering over the topic of our collective propensity to be single, two of us milled trough Internet sites to locate the Myer's Briggs personality profile. Using the base descriptions to the four inclusive letters that make each of so different, we stitched together our quadrants and read our descriptions to each other. Laughing at how one letter variance can make such a difference in how we carry ourselves through life.

I realized last night, as I danced in my favorite Black Eyed Peas song in my oversized night shirt and panties with two my trip mates, that this would be a good time. Concluding that I was not the only one needed to become my authentic self, accepting the delivered safety in the previous conversations and personal relationships that would be forged on the cliff overlooking the coal black star filled darkness that crossed the ocean.